My Nightmares Keep Me Up At Night Without You
by pinktron
Summary: John is having nightmares about the fall yet again. It's a good thing Sherlock is finally back again. Bromantic Johnlock...


**A/N: So, this is a lovely little drabble for TheChemicalAuthor. They asked for a drabble about nightmares and comfort, and the idea kind of ran into a one-shot! So… here is some nightmare and comfort. Read on darlings! Read on!**

**-Pinktron**

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It was like a bullet to the brain or a knife to the heart. John watched in slow motion as his best friend, well really his only friend, fell from the rooftop of St. Bart's. At first he thought the man would land gently on the concrete or at the last second do something miraculous… but he didn't. John heard the horrendous crack of a skull hitting pavement and he immediately jogged toward his friend. He was momentarily stunned by the cyclist, but he composed himself quickly. He had to get to Sherlock…

Everything went still as he grabbed his friend's hand and time went backwards. Suddenly he was again standing on the ground. His phone was pressed to his ear as he saw the taller man stand on top of the building.

"Keep your eyes fixed on me!" John could do nothing but stare and mumble helplessly. "Can you do this for me?" Finally he found his voice. He knew what was going to happen and he lunged forward, calling out.

"SHERLOCK!" The name rolled off his tongue and into mid-air. It was like it had fallen onto deaf ears, as for a second time the detective sorrowfully said: "Goodbye, John."

"Don't do this…" John whispered into the phone. He was pleading now. Pleading for his friend's life. "Don't do this! You can't jump! Sherlock please!" He was screaming now. Screaming into a phone he knew had already been discarded onto the rooftop in Moriarty's blood and splattered brains. The next thing he knew he was watching his friend fall again.

"NO!" The scream ripped from this throat as he lunged forward. Just as he reached Sherlock his eyes flew open. He sat up in bed completely drenched in sweat, dazed and confused. IT took him a moment to realize that he was in his bed in Baker Street.

Baker Street? Right, yes. Sherlock had been back from the dead for more than 2 months. He hadn't really died. He hadn't truly jumped. John felt as if he himself was falling. He felt as if he couldn't pull himself off the blood splattered pavement. He couldn't slow his heart rate and his breathing just became more ragged.

It seemed like hours went by, but it must have only been minutes. Slowly the great wood door of The Doctor's bedroom was pushed aside and he could see a tall figure come close to his bed. "I heard you scream." Sherlock Holmes in his dressing gown and junk clothing sat himself on the edge of John's bed. The man wasn't good at comfort, but he placed a hand on his blogger's knee. "I heard you scream my name."

John took in a shuddering breath. "I was there again. All over again." He looked down trying to avoid eye contact with his friend. "You were on that roof again… I couldn't' stop it."

"Nothing you could have done would have changed my decision." Sherlock moved himself onto the bed lying himself right next to the doctor.

"I blamed myself, Sherlock!" John finally faced his flat mate and looked straight into the icy blue eyes. "I thought it was MY fault! I thought I did something wrong!"

Sherlock twisted his face into a confused expression. "You know you didn't do anything wrong. I'm back now."

"They haven't stopped. I don't know why.' John began to openly cry, and if he was honest with himself he probably had wanted to open up about this a long time ago. "I just… every night. Omigod, Sherlock you don't know!" The last part was a whisper scream that ripped from his throat.

"I know." Sherlock put his head down on one of John's pillows and rested his hands on his stomach. His pants would probably need to be ironed after this, but he really couldn't find it within himself to care. "John, I know…" His voice trailed off as it began to crack.

"No you don't!"

"John, I promise you I know."

"NO! YOU WON'T EVER UNDERSTAND!"

With that last scream Sherlock sat straight up in the bed and grabbed John by the wrists. He looked his right in the eyes which had become alive with emotion. "I KNOW!" He roared right in the army doctors face and then released his wrists, falling back onto the bed. "I saw you all the time. You were in my head… in my mind palace. Behind that bolted door I don't ever venture to go. I had a mission and I had to forget. I couldn't John. I couldn't forget you."

John saw a few tears fall down his flat mates face and suddenly felt extremely guilty for shouting. If anyone knew Sherlock's emotions it was the Doctor and this argument just reminded him of the last time he had really talked to his friend: _"You MACHINE!" _

"I'm…. sorry…" John whispered into the dim room; not daring to look at his friend. "I shouldn't have shouted."

"You have every right."

John sighed and turned onto his side. His heart rate was finally returning to normal and his breathing was beginning to even out. He was still sweating, but that could be the combined effects of the nightmare and the body heat radiating from his best friend. "I'm glad you came back."

The two flat mates were now face to face. IT was an awkward situation for both of them, but they pushed those feelings aside for the moment. Sherlock let his lips tug into a small smile and again he gently wrapped his arms around his friend. "I was alone. I missed you." He scooted closer to the army doctor, laying his head on his friend's shoulder.

John shook his head. "I missed you too." He let himself be comforted by the hug. The awkward and unusual sense of the situation began to melt away, and the older man found himself actually enjoying this level of emotion and comfort radiating from his friend.

It was a comfortable silence for the rest of the night, and both fell asleep listening to the heartbeat of the other. When John awoke, Sherlock was gone, and he could hear the man playing the violin on the lower level of the flat. John let his eyes close again and just listened, because this was the way life should be.

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**A/N: So, I hope that pleased TheChemicalAuthor and everyone else! Thanks for your patience because it was supposed to be up like days ago! XD Please chuck a review my way! I love ya'll! I do take prompts for stories or drabbles for any ship! Follow me on Tumblr: klainebaby123 3**


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